Holding Yourself Hostage


I believe that one of the greatest tragedies in life is when people hold themselves hostage.

It happens for one fundamental reason: they choose to believe they have no choices available to them other than the way things currently are.

Unhappy with their present reality, but believing they have no choice, they become a hostage in their own lives, personally or professionally.  It's a horrific cycle that tempts all of us at some point, and one that far too many people end up accepting.

But we always have choice.  Always.

What we don't always have is the guarantee of positive consequences as a result of the choices we might make.

Don't like your job?  Quit.

Don't like a relationship?  Confront.

Cope. Quit. Confront. Create.

I have never been in a situation in which one if not all of those choices were available to me as options.  Quitting might mean I use up all my savings.  Confronting might mean losing a friend.  Coping might mean I have little energy for doing anything else.  Creating might mean stepping into a new story when I don't know the ending.

But I have choice.  While I might not like the consequences those choices may forecast, I always have choice.

Choosing to believe we have no choice is in itself a choice.

And that's one in which the consequences are almost always negative.